So I had to post for today.....since it made me smile....just a little
"If You Want To Be Happy, Be."
-Leo Tolstoy
Saturday, June 27, 2015
Thursday, June 25, 2015
Somebody To Love
We're all hoping, we're all hopeless
We're all thorns and we're all roses
We're all looking down our noses at ourselves
We're all flawed and we're all perfect
We're all lost and we're all hurting
And just searching for somebody to love
We're all liars, we're all legends
We're all tens, I'd want elevens
We're all trying to get to heaven, but not today
We're all happy, we're all hatin'
We're all patiently impatient
And just waiting for somebody to love
We're all good, but we ain't angels
We all sin, but we ain't devils
We're all pots and we're all kettles
But we can't see it in ourselves
We're all livin' 'til we're dying
We ain't cool, but man, we're trying
Just thinking we'll be fixed by someone else
We all wrangle with religion
We all talk, but we don't listen
We're all starving for attention then we'll run
We're all paper, we're all scissors
We're all fightin' with our mirrors
Scared we'll never find somebody to love
Just tryin' to hold it all together
We all wish our best was better
Just hopin' that forever's really real
We'll miss a dime to grab a nickel
Over complicate the simple
We're all little kids just looking for love
We're all thorns and we're all roses
We're all looking down our noses at ourselves
We're all flawed and we're all perfect
We're all lost and we're all hurting
And just searching for somebody to love
We're all liars, we're all legends
We're all tens, I'd want elevens
We're all trying to get to heaven, but not today
We're all happy, we're all hatin'
We're all patiently impatient
And just waiting for somebody to love
We're all good, but we ain't angels
We all sin, but we ain't devils
We're all pots and we're all kettles
But we can't see it in ourselves
We're all livin' 'til we're dying
We ain't cool, but man, we're trying
Just thinking we'll be fixed by someone else
We all wrangle with religion
We all talk, but we don't listen
We're all starving for attention then we'll run
We're all paper, we're all scissors
We're all fightin' with our mirrors
Scared we'll never find somebody to love
Just tryin' to hold it all together
We all wish our best was better
Just hopin' that forever's really real
We'll miss a dime to grab a nickel
Over complicate the simple
We're all little kids just looking for love
Yeah, don't we all just want somebody to love?
Throwback 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2015
Was Feeling Like Barbara Walters
I randomly decided to ask some of my fellow friends/fools some questions. Call them interview questions if you will, but the idea randomly came to me when I was bored at work. I've always enjoyed meeting people and getting to know them and reflect upon the similarities and differences between myself and these people. It's amazing because in the end we all have dreams, fears, desires, hopes, failures, success, etc. We all have stories to share. So here are some lame questions that I randomly generated......
***Disclaimer. These questions literally just came up in my head. No motives or shenanigans involved
First Guest....we will call him Cyril (Inside Joke)
What are your three big goals within the next year or so?
Goal #1: Declare a major.
Goal #2: Pass every class with at least a B.
Goal #3: Find a nice place with cheaper rent than The Republic Apartments.
As a gay man, what do you fear most and what do you wish to change about
society and yourself?
As a gay man I fear persecution most and being in a place where my entire support
system is gone. I wish our society didn’t care so much about things that don’t matter.
We worry ourselves with things we shouldn’t especially when it comes to celebrities.
There’s a lot I wish to change about myself, however, the biggest thing would probably
be my lack of confidence. Cliche but everyone can improve in this area.
What do you think is your ultimate purpose in life?
I’ve always felt that I was meant to help another person (or other people) overcome
similar challenges that I’ve faced.
Do you feel it is more important to be honest or to do what is right?
I believe honesty is the most important.
What is something that you take for granted that you may not express?
I feel that I have a tendency to take my loved ones for granted. I wouldn't be anywhere
without my family who supports me and the friends who help me grow. I struggle to find
ways to show my appreciation. Sometimes a simple “thank you” doesn't feel adequate.
What is something in your life that you wish to have with you always?
I wish to always have a collection of old pictures. There’s nothing better than
discovering old family photos.
In dating or seeking to get married, what do you look for in another person, and
what holds you back from taking the “leap?”
If I’m honestly considering to date someone I look for qualities such as selflessness,
honesty, or just a great sense of humor. More importantly, I look for someone who
understands what it means to struggle and who can overcome heartache. Life is both
beautiful and tragic and when you decide to share it with another be sure that the both
of you are ready to handle it together.
What do you think is something you wish to succeed in?
I would like to succeed in school.
What do you think the most important lesson is that life has taught you?
The most important lesson that I’ve learned so far is that determination gets you to
where you want to be. Also not to give up. There’s always a solution to a problem.
What is holding you back from being yourself 100% to all those you know? If
applicable, why haven’t you “come out?”
What is holding me back from being truly expressive of myself is my deep fear of
loneliness and with that comes the fear of being rejected by loved ones. I don’t know
that I’ll ever truly come out but I know that most secrets (especially ones about who you
really are) don’t stay secrets for long.
What is the biggest misconception you think the general American public has
with being a homosexual?
I think that the biggest misconception of being gay is that homosexuality is the result of
having a dysfunctional relationship with their parent or guardian of the same sex.
Do you think marriage is something that is important?
Yes, marriage is sacred vow of love between two people, however, I feel that is may not
be for me.
Are you happy? Truly?
No. I’ll get there.
What is something that you take for granted that you may not express?
I feel that I have a tendency to take my loved ones for granted. I wouldn't be anywhere
without my family who supports me and the friends who help me grow. I struggle to find
ways to show my appreciation. Sometimes a simple “thank you” doesn't feel adequate.
What is something in your life that you wish to have with you always?
I wish to always have a collection of old pictures. There’s nothing better than
discovering old family photos.
In dating or seeking to get married, what do you look for in another person, and
what holds you back from taking the “leap?”
If I’m honestly considering to date someone I look for qualities such as selflessness,
honesty, or just a great sense of humor. More importantly, I look for someone who
understands what it means to struggle and who can overcome heartache. Life is both
beautiful and tragic and when you decide to share it with another be sure that the both
of you are ready to handle it together.
What do you think is something you wish to succeed in?
I would like to succeed in school.
What do you think the most important lesson is that life has taught you?
The most important lesson that I’ve learned so far is that determination gets you to
where you want to be. Also not to give up. There’s always a solution to a problem.
What is holding you back from being yourself 100% to all those you know? If
applicable, why haven’t you “come out?”
What is holding me back from being truly expressive of myself is my deep fear of
loneliness and with that comes the fear of being rejected by loved ones. I don’t know
that I’ll ever truly come out but I know that most secrets (especially ones about who you
really are) don’t stay secrets for long.
What is the biggest misconception you think the general American public has
with being a homosexual?
I think that the biggest misconception of being gay is that homosexuality is the result of
having a dysfunctional relationship with their parent or guardian of the same sex.
Do you think marriage is something that is important?
Yes, marriage is sacred vow of love between two people, however, I feel that is may not
be for me.
Are you happy? Truly?
No. I’ll get there.
Second guest.....we will call him Embellished Kid
What are your three big goals within the next year or so?
Make Warrant Officer
Get a new car
Finish my degree
As a gay man, what do you fear most and what do you wish to change about society and yourself?
I fear that we will never be equal as gays
I would change the hatred we have towards one another
To help people and make them happy
Do you feel it is more important to be honest or to do what is right?
Well of course I feel like its more important to do what's right
What is something that you take for granted that you may not express?
Hmm I dunno at the moment
What is something you wish you had with you all the time?
Peace/happiness
In dating or seeking to get married, what do you look for in another person, and what holds you back from taking the “leap?”
I look for them to be unique, honest, self aware, an individual and supportive...what holds me back is me being afraid
What do you think is something you wish to succeed in?
I wish to succeed in life.
What do you think the most important lesson is that life has taught you?
I learned that no matter what bad things happen to me that I must continue to be a good person
What is the biggest misconception you think the general American public has with being a homosexual?
That we chose this lifestyle
What is holding you back from being yourself 100% to all those you know? If applicable, why haven’t you “come out?”
This goes back to the other question I feel like this is the right thing to do verses being overly honest because I know to some in my family this would bring discomfort but if asked I would tell the truth
Do you think marriage is something that is important?
I do think marriage is super important and it's not taken serious as it use to be
Are you happy? Truly?
As of right now i am truly full and happy of course I can always be happier but at this stage in life and at this moment I am content.
Thanks for participating guys :) After reading through your answers and thinking it over I have one realization.................................................................
I'll do my own answers to some of these questions at some point. Adios!
Sunday, June 7, 2015
Partners In Crime
I forgot in my last post to mention one other thing. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LAREE!!!!
For those of you who don't know, LaRee is a cousin/confidant/best friend/fellow fool who I grew up with. It wasn't until our teenage years that we started to actually spend quality time together and become the fools we are today. (aww the awkward teenage years).
With our Disney obsession as a main bond between us we were usually known as an odd bunch but we didn't give a care in the world.
From door bell ditching in Santa Hats to spur of the moment Disneyland trips it's been one hell of a ride. She recently just got married so we have another fool in the clan.
Happy Birthday LeFou! Looovvvveeeee yeeeewwwwwwww
These pictures basically sum up everything you need to know about us...
Still cracking jokes at 25
These may be the best pictures ever because it sums up everything. Note**there was no theme to this dance we went to. We just decided to go through our grandmother's 1980's drawer and dress up
Good times at Disneyland
Happy Birthday Larry,
Brain Dump
I don't really know why but I seem to 1. Write my posts when I'm at work 2. I write these posts when I am sleep deprived and very drowsy and 3. Ramble on and on making no real point. BUT that's what makes it me I guess.
It's been awhile since I have posted. Been super busy with school, work, and just day to day life like most people. No complaints. Just sometimes feel like I'm caught up in a cycle of a no progress type feeling. Or just kinda plataeuing in life like I'm caught in some time zone where I'm stuck and can't see a way out. Never seems to happen when I'm doing something I love but instead when you are in a phase of life or specific task that bores you or is mediocre. Like can anyone really remember when they were 9 years old? Or 22? Those years are just like the state of Arkansas, New Mexico, Vermont and The Dakotas-forgotten.
Anyway tonight before I headed out to work my mom, sister, and I started to watch the movie The Imitation Game. I had seen it before but gladly decided to watch it again. Didn't get to finish it because I had to go to work but that movie for some reason just collects a barrel full of emotions for me. Inspires, saddens, makes you think etc. The music also is probably what makes up like 80% of a movie. But honestly what that movie does for me is reminds me how much I love England, the British, the complicated nature of the mind and how we as humans just have so much diversity and so much to give to the never ending cycle of lessons in life and fullfilment. If you haven't seen this movie go see it. Made my top five movies list in my book.
We just let life pass us by. Or at least I do at times. In school I'm bombarded on a daily basis or crazy philosophies, individuals, murderers, humanitarians, leaders, etc. Quite the mix and somedays I have so many different ideologies hitting me and studying them that I honestly feel like my brain will explode. Just pass me a beer or joint or whatever.....not really.
But one thing I have seen is that just the natural world and nature alone really make me forget and just enjoy the beautiful simple things.
I had the opportunity to venture out and hike a small trail in Tahoe. Totally unplanned, ORGANIC, and just a nice day. Like Mark Twain said, "If you want to breathe the air angels breathe, go to Tahoe." Also I had the luck of going to San Francisco with another fellow FOOL Sam my fellow collegue from UNR. Freezing most the day but urban city life does bring its natural beauty as well. Pics below.
Anyways like the title says this is just a brain dump or "Talk About Your Feelings" post. I get tired honestly, literally like physically tired, of discussing my 'story' of who I am, how I got to be where I am, my worries or hopes and dreams. Sometimes I just wanna live and enjoy the now but it seems so hard.
It's been awhile since I have posted. Been super busy with school, work, and just day to day life like most people. No complaints. Just sometimes feel like I'm caught up in a cycle of a no progress type feeling. Or just kinda plataeuing in life like I'm caught in some time zone where I'm stuck and can't see a way out. Never seems to happen when I'm doing something I love but instead when you are in a phase of life or specific task that bores you or is mediocre. Like can anyone really remember when they were 9 years old? Or 22? Those years are just like the state of Arkansas, New Mexico, Vermont and The Dakotas-forgotten.
Anyway tonight before I headed out to work my mom, sister, and I started to watch the movie The Imitation Game. I had seen it before but gladly decided to watch it again. Didn't get to finish it because I had to go to work but that movie for some reason just collects a barrel full of emotions for me. Inspires, saddens, makes you think etc. The music also is probably what makes up like 80% of a movie. But honestly what that movie does for me is reminds me how much I love England, the British, the complicated nature of the mind and how we as humans just have so much diversity and so much to give to the never ending cycle of lessons in life and fullfilment. If you haven't seen this movie go see it. Made my top five movies list in my book.
We just let life pass us by. Or at least I do at times. In school I'm bombarded on a daily basis or crazy philosophies, individuals, murderers, humanitarians, leaders, etc. Quite the mix and somedays I have so many different ideologies hitting me and studying them that I honestly feel like my brain will explode. Just pass me a beer or joint or whatever.....not really.
But one thing I have seen is that just the natural world and nature alone really make me forget and just enjoy the beautiful simple things.
I had the opportunity to venture out and hike a small trail in Tahoe. Totally unplanned, ORGANIC, and just a nice day. Like Mark Twain said, "If you want to breathe the air angels breathe, go to Tahoe." Also I had the luck of going to San Francisco with another fellow FOOL Sam my fellow collegue from UNR. Freezing most the day but urban city life does bring its natural beauty as well. Pics below.
Anyways like the title says this is just a brain dump or "Talk About Your Feelings" post. I get tired honestly, literally like physically tired, of discussing my 'story' of who I am, how I got to be where I am, my worries or hopes and dreams. Sometimes I just wanna live and enjoy the now but it seems so hard.
So here some pics. Swag.
**Disclaimer: I'm super awkward in pics and never really know what to do so my default is usually childish expressions. Sam and I at Baker Beach.
So artsy
Wow. Tyra Banks called, she wants he catwalk back. Smh
I am a prodigy of SPF 100 sunscreen. Need some sun
Navy bud Michael (Nice pose fool). The color contrast is incredible haha. Fun day
My brain is honestly out of ideas on what to ramble on about. But be proud of me because I NEVER take pics of my life honestly so this is a big step. And also had some coercion from those with me in the pics to be in the pictures.
Peace and Blessings. Have a good weekend
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